


did we?

by dollcewrites



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: "straight" guy friends get drunk at a casino and end up getting married trope, Bad decisions are made, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-22
Updated: 2015-01-22
Packaged: 2018-03-08 15:24:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,883
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3214106
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dollcewrites/pseuds/dollcewrites
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Iwaizumi's head is throbbing in a dull, heavy sort of way, that makes him feel like he took a sledge hammer to the temple recently.<br/>That is his first thought upon waking.<br/>Secondly, he notices how warm he is, something weighing down his side.<br/>He opens his eyes, turns his head to the side, sees his best friend (naked) lying on his chest (naked), legs draped over his own, and his third thought is "What the fuck."</p>
            </blockquote>





	did we?

**Author's Note:**

> You gotta help me out,  
> It's all a blur last night,  
> We need a taxi  
> 'Cause you're hung over and I'm broke
> 
> Why are these lights so bright?
> 
> Did we get hitched last night?  
> -  
> this is for rachel bless your love for iwaoi that inspires me to write iwaoi

Iwaizumi's head is throbbing in a dull, heavy sort of way, that makes him feel like he took a sledge hammer to the temple recently.

That is his first thought upon waking. 

Secondly, he notices how warm he is, something weighing down his side.

He opens his eyes, turns his head to the side, sees his best friend (naked) lying on his chest (naked), legs draped over his own, and his third thought is " _What the fuck."_

In a second he is sitting bolt-upright, shoving Oikawa off him violently enough to cause him to roll onto the floor.

_Thud._

"Ow!" Oikawa jerks awake and reaches up to his head with a pained expression. 

Rubbing his temple and blinking, he groans, "Iwa-chan, why'd you do that?" 

"PUT SOME CLOTHES ON!"

Oikawa eyes the blanket which Iwaizumi has pulled up to hide his own nudity.

Oikawa looks down at himself. (He seems less concerned than he should be at his lack of clothes.) He looks back at Iwaizumi, on the bed he just fell off. Iwaizumi can see the wheels turning as he puts two and two together.

"We… we didn't?" Oikawa's mouth is open.

Iwaizumi grits his teeth. "I think. I think we did."

Oikawa's looking a little to stunned to move, so Iwaizumi searches the floor of the hotel room with his eyes and after locating Oikawa's boxers (on the ground, by his side of the bed) he throws them to him.

The rest of their clothes are also strewn all over the floor.

They get dressed in silence.

"Iwaizumi."

He looks over to where Oikawa stands by the bedside table. He's holding up thin papers.

"What?"

"Iwa-chan, don't be too mad, okay? Stay calm. I think, the situation might be a liiiittle worse than it already is,"

" _What."_

"Well, this, er, _document_ right here says that—says that we're, um. We're married."

" _Oikawa Tooru. Tell me you are joking."_

Oikawa looks at him with wide, serious eyes. "Actually, it's Iwaizumi Tooru now. And, I'm not joking."

Iwaizumi crosses the room in two strides and snatches the papers from Oikawa.

"…They've got to be fake."

Seconds pass in silence.

"I don't think they're fake, Hajime."

_Hajime. Hajime…. Oikawa was saying Hajime last night. Last night_ _—_

Like a photo flip book, images spill into Iwaizumi's mind, as he works backwards from a hotel to a chapel-like place to a bar and—

* * *

“Iwa-chan, look!!”

It takes Iwaizumi a second to realise what Oikawa is pointing at.

“….Oikawa, _no._ ”

 

_Oikawa yes._

 

 

Iwaizumi had known this was a bad idea when Oikawa pulled him into the casino.

Seeing the bar, he had thought he’d found a not-so-bad idea.

The taste of the first shot had him questioning his idea. He waited a few minutes, looking at the people coming in, buying drinks, playing various games.

After the second shot, he congratulated himself on this idea. He was pleasantly warm all over and in a really good mood. He felt so good, in fact, that he went to find Oikawa.

Oikawa was, at present time, playing poker(and losing badly.) Much to the disappointment of the pretty blonde who Oikawa was been flirting with, Iwaizumi managed to drag him away from the game, but not before Oikawa could blow a kiss at her and wink.

He bought Oikawa a shot to console him, because he kept whining about how he’d “had the game all planned out” and “the pretty girl was really interested in me, Iwa-chan!”

…And another shot.

And another.

Around his seventh shot (Oikawa’s fifth) Iwaizumi began to regret his idea. It was a bad idea after all. 

They can’t afford any more shots and there’s enough money left for a taxi, and a pizza maybe. His clothes feel too hot and his head spins a little. 

“S’ pretty, Iwa-chan,” Oikawa murmurs, slurring his words, chin resting on his hand.

Iwaizumi frowns at the surface of the bar’s counter. The casino is now full, it’s dark outside, and the thrum of voices nearly drowns out Oikawa’s words. He tries to say “What’s that?” but it comes out more like “Whassat?”

“So… pretty… Iwa-chan.” Oikawa smiles proudly on completing the sentence.

Iwaizumi’s frown deepens and his eyes are closing. “Who? Wha?”

At this point Oikawa’s eyelids are also fluttering closed as he tries to look at Iwaizumi next to him. “Said you’re pretty.”

Iwaizumi’s expression turns to that of understanding before shifting back into a small frown. “Mmn, no, you’re the pretty one Tooru. Like… a k-pop star.”

Oikawa giggles. “Then you’re the handsome one! Handsome Iwa-chan!”

Iwaizumi’s cheeks feel quite hot; and it’s probably the alcohol, because his best friend complementing him shouldn’t make him blush and he likes girls he just doesn’t have time for them and Oikawa’s hand is closing around his wrist and he can smell his cologne and shampoo—

His vision is a blur of cheap patterned carpet and shoes and lights and then cold, fresh air hits his face and they’re outside on the street. Oikawa’s saying something and pulling him forward, turning to look at Iwaizumi as he leads him. He’s practically walking backwards when he trips, and Iwaizumi instinctively lunges forward to catch him.

If not for the wolf whistles and hoots from across the street, it would not have occurred to Iwaizumi that he was holding Oikawa to his chest like they’re about to kiss, Oikawa somewhat limp in his arms looking up into his face.

Oikawa’s surprised features relax into a smile. “Naww, Iwa-chan, you caught me!” He giggles. “‘Sn’t this romantic?”

Iwaizumi considers releasing him and letting him continue his drop to the pavement.

The hoots from across the street catch his attention. “Kiss!” Iwaizumi can hear a girl cheer from somewhere. His head spins a little more.

Oikawa's still looking up at him and he hasn't let him drop yet, for some reason. He's pretty sure he doesn't want to kiss Oikawa, (why would he?) but Oikawa's eyelashes are so long and curled at the tips, and his lips look very soft and pink and he's stretching up to meet Iwaizumi—

They're kissing.

Oikawa's lips are as soft as they look.

He tastes sort of like tequila, and Iwaizumi makes sure to taste him, swiping his tongue over Oikawa's bottom lip and dipping it into Oikawa's mouth which is hot, and _wow_ his best friend is good at kissing, and it feels weird but makes his blood race.

Pressed to his chest Oikawa has gone completely doll-like, and suddenly all his weight rests in Iwaizumi's arms. He has to break away to straighten them up before they tip. 

Oikawa giggles again.

Despite being righted and able to stand fine by himself (as well as one can while moderately drunk) Oikawa is still curled against him.

"Iwa-chan,"

"Mmm?"

"Let's get _married_ ,"

"What… the hell… what the hell, Tooru?"

"No, listen, I.." he breaks off to giggle a bit more and nuzzle into Iwaizumi's neck. "I've always wanted to get married. And you'd be—" he sighs which tickles against Iwaizumi's collar bone, "—such a good husband. Also, you keep calling me Tooru, Iwa-chan! Does this mean I can call you Hajime?"

If the spinning was bad before, it doesn't compare to the light headedness Iwaizumi suddenly experiences. Was his neck always this sensitive? _Did Oikawa just call him Hajime? It sounded really good on his lips…_ _Nice lips…._

"Kiss me again," is all he manages to breath.

Oikawa does.

Only when the spinning gets unbearable does Iwaizumi break away. Apparently he had forgotten to breathe. _Right, yeah, oxygen is important._

"I am going to marry you, Hajime," Oikawa sings as he steps back. "Come on,"

Iwaizumi thinks vaguely of Oikawa in a wedding dress (which he giggles at in a very un-Iwaizumi like way) before thinking of Oikawa in a tuxedo.  A weird feeling of heat flushes his body. He doesn't remember Oikawa leading him anywhere.

 

 

 

"Do you, Iwaizumi Hajime, take Oikawa Tooru to be your lawfully wedded husband?"

"I do." 

"And, do you, Oikawa Tooru, take Iwaizumi Hajime to be y—"

"I do,"

"That's that. You may now… kiss the groom." The man smiles at them. Iwaizumi remembers thinking he's a very nice man.

He remembers kissing Oikawa, sliding his arms around him, while Oikawa's hands ran through his hair.

 

He remembers sliding his hands over Oikawa's bare thighs. _When did his clothes come off?_

 

He remembers Oikawa's hand sliding down his stomach, lips following, pressing a wet trail of kisses. _When did_ my _clothes come off?_

 

_He remembers quite a number of other body parts sliding together, such as his hand and Oikawa's cock, Oikawa's tongue and his own cock, and other things which he tries desperately to push to the back of his mind but he just can't let go of._

* * *

Once the flip-book stops, a full album of answers settled into Iwaizumi's memory, he sinks onto the bed.

Next to him Oikawa's hands have curled into fists.

"Oh my god."

Iwaizumi nods.

"We really, fucked up, Iwa-chan!"

Iwaizumi nods again. At least Oikawa is sounding mildly distressed now.

A minute or so passes in silence.

"…Was I good in bed?"

"ASSKAWA!" 

"Oww, Iwa-chan, don't hit my head! It hurts soo bad right now," Oikawa moans.

"…I don't remember if you were or not, okay?"

Oikawa shrugs. "I remember liking it."

 _So do I,_ Iwaizumi thinks. He doesn't say this.

"I can't _believe_ you got us married. What are we gonna do, Oikawa? _Divorces cost money._ Money which we _don't have."_

Oikawa looks out the window with that serious, calculating expression.

"I guess we'll have to stay married."

"Oh my god." Iwaizumi's head falls into his hands.

An eyebrow is raised at him. "I mean, at least you had fun last night, right Iwa-chan?" Oikawa's voice is lightly teasing but Iwaizumi knows him too well to miss the undertone of insecurity. He sighs.

"…I remember enjoying it too, ok?"

Surprise flickers on Oikawa's features for a moment before he smiles. "So maybe there's an upside to our accidental marriage?"

" _Shittykawa,_ what are you say—"

"I'm saying you have just landed yourself a husband with many talents."

His cheeks are burning. "You've got to be kidding me."

Oikawa smiles wider. "Last night we got drunk, married, and had—if I remember correctly— _amazing_ newly-weds' sex. Is it not reasonable to make the best of our situation here?"

Iwaizumi's head hurts and he's at the edge of his nerves. Oikawa's logic makes sense to him in a twisted sort of way, and after royally fucking up, marrying, and sleeping with Oikawa he really doesn't see how this could make it worse.

"…I guess. What did you… have in mind?"

 

 

Oikawa is as good at kissing as he remembers. No, better. He's even better sober.

In all aspects.

(Iwaizumi has the best sex he's ever had.)

 

 

They find out how much a divorce costs the next week.

(Iwaizumi also discovers that Oikawa gives amazing blowjobs.)

 

 

They have enough money for a divorce after two months.

(Oikawa also has enough hickeys on his body to pass as a leopard.)

 

 

They put off the divorce for a little while. 

("It's sort of funny.")

 

 

They have a real wedding reception and ceremony eight months later.

(They never get a divorce.)

**Author's Note:**

> p.s. oikawa had woken up before him and just went with it. then he fell asleep again and next thing he knows he's being pushed off the bed (iwa-chan is so rude!!)


End file.
